August 31 Lk. 4:16-30
Jesus was accepted by some rejected by others. but oftentimes most amazing conincidence is that those who rejected him were those closet to him. He did not do any miracles before them, because of their lack of faith. Jesus had to leave Nazareth because the people there not only rejected him, they would have killed him, just because he spoke the truth to them. I have a friend, or a person whom I have befriended during the years, but he continually rejects me. He sees himself as far better then me. He dresses better, he drinks the right wine and eats the right food, he really has no friends because of his attitude. I offered to take him to a church meeting last night but he bascially wanted me to hide when I took him because supposedly his “bishop” does not like me. I have never been good enough for him–but then I am responsible for his ordination, and have covered for him when he has offended people time after time. I am hurt, and I am angry, and I feel rejected, and I am not sure I can continue to be friends with him. This has been coming for along time, and what bothers me the most is he is so walled off he does not see it. I am also worrying about my fifteenth anniversary celebration. People are going to be gone, and then I do not know who will come. Five years ago it was different. I had more connections, and the scene in the city was different. My ministry has largely been me these past years, largely because things have changed, there is not the excitement there was about working with people on the street, and the people I work with have gotten more and more difficult. Last night I spent time with 22 year old Zach, crazed out of his mind on heroine, not able to concentrate, in his on world. I spent an hour watching every move he made, trying to simply talk to him. 30 year old Ryan was at my door early this morning, so centered in on himself that he was unable to even understand that I had just gotten up and did not have time to hang with him, became angry because I would let him in, I gave him socks and food, and came back upstairs. It is getting very diffiicult with people on the streets now–money is not there, the police are a constant presence, and services are not there–and so it is difficult. People do not enjoy coming down to work with me because they do not “see change” and they get discouraged. I am tired of being told how different I am, I wish people would look at themselves a little, and I am tired of trying to please people. Frankly, I am done. My way of life is different, but it does not make me any less of a person. Deo Gratis! Thanks be to God!